Today is the day. The day I will be released. Released from hospital, into a new life. I have been very silent the past couple of days, barely spoken a word. Liz seems worried and Doctor Morrison seemed to dislike my behavior as well.
I had to promise him to think about a therapy as well as coming to all of my follow up check -ups.
I bought one of the white wooden houses, I have signed the contract three days ago. On the same day I have signed the contract to sell the family business. I am happy to leave the hospital but scared at the same time. I am sad that Liz won`t be there every single day, although we will stay friends. But how everything will go I can`t say, nobody can.
Today is the day I was looking forward to, but I am also scared. Today I will move into my new house, that I have so far only seen from the outside.
“Promise me to take care of yourself and if there is anything, call me. And don`t forget to invite me to your housewarming party.” Liz interrupts my thoughts. “You got this.” Liz concludes and gives me a hug.
“Thank you Liz for everything.” I took a big breath in. “ I got this.” Liz pushes me into the taxi, closes the door and leaves. She hates farewells just as much as I do.
There I am. Standing with my bag in front of my house.
I make my way through the garden to the back door. I open the door and step into the kitchen. The kitchen was small, but for me it will be big enough. I do not even know how to cook so, it shouldn`t be a problem. I like the old wooden floor. It is in need of new paint but basically the whole house will be in need of that. I put my bag on the kitchen counter and start making my way through the house. The living room has two very big windows that give me a perfect view on the ocean. The waves, the surfers, the beach, all that was right in front of me. There was a couch covered by a big sheet in the living room, as well as a small table and two armchairs. I took another look at the ocean before I make my way upstairs. There is my bedroom with an even better look on the ocean. The lighting is just beautiful. The room is so bright. The old bed looked exactly as Liz described it, not to enormous, simple but beautiful. Liz had already been to the house as I had asked her to organize a new mattress. As usual Liz didn`t just organize a mattress, she had also thought of bed sheets which I found now on the bed with a little note, “ I hope you know how to put the bed sheets on..!”
I had to smile. There are also two dressers in the bedroom, matching the bed. I need to take another look on the ocean before I move on to the bathroom through the hallway. It was cleaner and nicer than I expected. White shiny tiles on the wall and a mosaic on the floor that reminds me of the ocean. In the middle of the room a free standing bathtub and in the corner a shower. The furniture looked as if they were matching the bedroom furniture again. From the outside she would have never thought, that this house was so nice. It isn`t perfect but it has a lot of potential.
I went back into the kitchen to get a bucket of water and a mop and started to clean the floors and the furniture. By the time I finished cleaning it has already become evening. I still haven`t eaten and my stomach starts to call for food. I open the fridge and notice that I haven`t bought any groceries yet and even if I would have, I wouldn`t know how to cook. I don`t have any take away flyers yet. I have just moved in.
I took my jacket and my keys and left the house through the back door. I walk towards the beach. When I drove by this road with Liz there was a little kiosk just down the beach. I hope to find something there. There were still surfers out there although the sun has started to set. I think I have seen one of them already in the morning, but I am not sure.
Finally I can see the little hut that I had seen when I drove by with Liz. There was a porch in front of the hut and a sign at the entrance that names the dish of the day. I went in and ordered a salad some garlic bread and two bottles of water for take away and then I started my way back home.
The sun colours the water in a read that reminds me of fire. The colours of the sky are just gorgeous. And the surfers finally seem to make their way back to the beach.
I enter my house again through the backdoor. Put one of the water bottles in the fridge and then sit down with my salad and the other water bottle in one of the armchairs. I didn`t had a CD-Player or a TV yet. Most of my stuff is still in my old home. Maybe I should go and get them, it is so silent in this house. Just the sound of the Ocean and the cars that drive by. I am sitting there a little bit longer watching the ocean before I decide to bring the garbage outside and go to bed.
Liz was wrong to think that I didn`t know how to put the bed sheets on. I knew it exactly but there was always the problem with the blanket. I was simply too small to put it on with just one try. But in the end I made it. I was lying in my bed, listening to the sound of the waves, when the tears started to run. I can`t tell why. I was lying in bed awake until the next morning. I feel so lonely in this house. While having my breakfast I made my decision. I would go to the shelter today and adopt a dog. A dog I always wanted to have.