Wednesday, May 4, 2016
Something Special for you! Chapter 51
We had been walking now for almost six hours. Emma had done great, she had stopped sometimes to relax her back from the backpack and to drink something, but I had expected her to complain a lot more.
I had used those breaks to take some photographs, first from the fields, the trees, the flowers and the mountain in the background, as well as of the sky. Then from Emma how she was stretching her back. How she showed me her tongue while pressing her hands into her hips.
After almost ten hours we had arrived at the mountain lake. We built our tent by the lake. I was lucky that Scott knew how to build up a tent otherwise I would have had to sleep in a very unstabil tent. I saw how Balu was drinking by the lake and then I saw the look on Scotts face.
"No no no no" I said while taking my shorts off, as I knew that I would end up in that lake in the next minute. Before I was able to take my shirt off Scott had already taken me and brought and thrown me into the lake. I wanted back on the land because the water was freaking cold but he pulled me back in. It was one of the moments where I could have killed him, but I regret those thoughts most times once I noticed how much fun I actually had.
We fought in the water, swam, floated on our back looking at the sky.
I didn`t know how long we had been in the water but I was freezing so I swam back to the land. Once Scott noticed that he came after me ran out of the water and got me a towel.
I wrapped her into a towel completely. She was really freezing, shaking all over. Then I took a towel myself. I lighted the fire on the fireplace in front of our tent. We cuddled up in front of the fireplace. Warmed ourselves up. Enjoying the silence. We could hear the birds sing. The wind in the trees. How the branches cracked. I could
I could hear my breath. Scotts breath. Balus breath.
Nature had so much to give. Life had so much to give and I had nearly missed out on all of that. Living a life where time just flew by. A life in which time is money. A life in which society and the people around you create your lifestyle. A lifestyle in the city. You can still live on the countyside when you are old. At an age where I would probably be too old to go on hikes and camping trips.
The city that was never silent. Where there always is a car or a machine disturbing the natural sounds. The city, where they sky is always greyish from the smog. The city where I never wanted to live in again. I was sure about that by now.
I didn`t had made a mistake by moving into the small suburb by the ocean. When I had taken a time out to find myself. Even though it had become clear to me that I had never lost myself.
Suddenly I stood up went to my backpack and picked not only the snacks up but also a file. I handed it to Scott who was looking at me wondering what that was.
"That is the report of the accident" I explained. I didn`t want to tell him myself anything about it as it would simply be a repetition of the report. Except of the blinding light, the sound of a nearing truck and a loud bang I didn`t remember a thing.
I read it while we were eating. It didn`t had much information, but the information included were enough to understand her reaction. Her families car had crashed frontally with a truck. There were no obvious reasons for that. Her parents had died on the scene. The officer who had written the report did think her father had driven into the truck on purpose as there had been no braking marks. No other proof had been found as there had been no victims except of Emma who couldn`t remember a thing. I saw the pictures of the wreck and did wonder how she made it out of it alive.
"You really don`t remember a thing from that night?" I asked carefully. She thought about it for a bit before she nodded her head and added, " I remember bright light, the sound of a truck passing by and then a loud bang."
"Do you want to remember that night?" I wanted to bite my tongue, but she wouldn`t have given me the report if she wouldn`t have been ready to talk about it. She stayed quiet. I could see how she was thinking about the question.
"Well for the first time in my life I am happy. Here with you. I am free. I can be who and how I am. I don`t think that remembering that moment could make it any better."
I nodded. Understanding. I wrapped my arm around her. We were done talking about it. On the one hand because I could see how difficult it was for her and on the other hand because I understood her. Understood that the memory wouldn`t have helped. Especially not after I had read it. I had known before that her parents had had high expectations. But when the officer had been right she had also live with the thought that her father had been willing to not only kill himself but also her mother and her.
There had been something else I had noticed while reading the report. The family name. It sounded familiar. Right now I couldn`t say where I knew the name from but I was sure I knew that name. I had heared her saying it but it didn`t sound familiar until I had read her fathers first name. Maybe I would remember it some time.